Ghostbusters 1984 Kid Review

As we arrive upon the release of the Ghostbusters 2016 ‘reboot’, ‘remake’, ‘redo’ – or whatever they want to call it – we can expect to see venom, anger and rejection hurled at it.

Let’s face it, the hostility has already erupted ever since this thing was first announced. When that first trailer hit the rancor shot up to unprecedented levels, giving the trailer the embarassing distinction of being the most disliked movie trailer in Youtube history.

The animosity has been building to absurd levels. On July 15, 2016 the pressure will explode with what I suspect will be a torrent of criticism, complaints, anger, rage and viciousness for this hoped for re-ignition of the comedy franchise. After decades of waiting by fans for a new installment of Ghostbusterswill Paul Feig’s film be the one everyone has been waiting for?

Possible, but I doubt it.

I thought I would do something to contrast the expected further hate and complaining that longtime older fans will unleash when the remake comes out – and possibly even the young ones as well. Maybe even non-Ghostbusters fans will gripe about it!

Instead of jumping aboard the complain train (for now at least) I thought I would focus on the more optimistic, sunnier, innocent perspective of young Ghostbuster fans and be reminded what an entertaining, funny movie the original 1984 film is through their tender eyes.

So, I sat with my nephews and nieces for a movie night watching the original film. They’ve already seen it, enjoy it and not surprisingly they’ve also become fans of Ghostbusters.

However, in their minds they don’t consider it a ‘comedy classic’ as us older fans do. It’s not something sacred that Hollywood should never touch.

To older movie fans once upon a time a sequel to a movie seemed special and highly anticipated. To the younger millennial generation they’re used to ongoing franchises and seeing sequel after sequel. It’s just the way movies work now.

To them it’s a funny movie with a fun song. They haven’t been waiting thirty-plus years for a sequel to it. It’s simply ‘Ghostbusters‘ and ‘oh they’re doing a new one this summer’.

They’re much less passionate about it. It’s just another entertainment brand they know and there’s sequels, cartoons, toys and video games of it. There’s no sentimental baggage attached to it.

I don’t think they would ever understand why so many older fans want to storm the offices of Sony with pitchforks and torches and drag those responsible for this new remake of Ghostbusters out to the town square.

So, here’s a group of four kids ages 6-10 watching Ghostbusters with me eavesdropping in and doing some prodding. Sort of like a kiddie commentary of the movie.

The Movie Begins

“Do you guys know how the song goes?”

“Uhhh…there’s something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call?
Ghostbusters!“

“Hey, not bad!”

“I forget the rest, but know the easy parts when you say ‘Who you gonna call – Ghostbusters!”

Opening Psychic Card Scene

We meet Bill Murray’s Peter Venkman as he’s conducting an experiment with some volunteers.

“Watch, Peter is lying to them when they have to guess what’s on the cards.”

“Why do you think he’s lying to them?”

“‘Cause he thinks the girl is pretty. He always tells her she guessed right.”

“I would always want Peter to show me the cards so I could make sure I got them right or not.”

The Library Scene

The three soon-to-be Ghostbusters arrive at the New York Public Library.

“They’re going to see their first ghost! Watch how scared they get!”

“Would you be scared?”

“No. The library ghost isn’t scaring them until they try to attack her. She’s just reading and wants them to be quiet.”

“She does leave slime on the books though.”

“I never saw a ghost at our library.”

Buying The Firehouse and A New Car

After getting fired from their college gigs the guys need a place to open their new business and they arrive at the famous firehouse.

“They’re going to buy the firehouse, that’s going to be their new home.” 

“Ray likes the pole in the firehouse. It’s fun to slide down them. We have a pole at school. We take turns going down it.”

“Would you want to live in a firehouse?”

“YES!”

“What would be so good about living in a firehouse?”

“‘Cause you can slide down the pole everyday!”

“The bells could get loud though.”

“Ray buys the ugly car, but it looks better later when he fixes it.”

“I want to get the Ghostbusters Lego Firehouse. I only have the Ghostbusters figures and the Ecto-1. See it has a license plate on the front and back that says ‘Ecto-1’.”

“Ooooh that looks pretty neat! Maybe I can take it home with me and keep it!”

“No.”

Dana’s Apartment Building

We get introduced to Dana and Louis played by Sigourney Weaver and Rick Moranis and the apartment building they live in where strange things will happen.

“You know that building is bad cause it looks scary. It has statues of the bad dogs on it. They shouldn’t have those there. They come to life later.”

“Wait a second, have all you guys seen this movie before?”

“Yes!”

“You know we did! We watched it with you!”

“I have the DVD and watched it eight times.”

“Louis should always carry a key cause he’s always locking himself out of his home.”

“Maybe he can hide a key in a rock – that’s what Mommy does.”

“But someone might see the rock in the hallway and take it.”

“Then he should call the man who owns the building to unlock the door for him.”

“Does Louis have an opposite in the new one?” (meaning is there going to be a Louis character in the remake)

“No I don’t think so.”

The Refrigerator Scene

As Dana unpacks her groceries something strange happens, along with her seeing something very scary in her refrigerator.

“The eggs are going to start to cook. That means the table gets hot.”

“See what else Dana bought at the store – Stay Puft Marshmallows.”

“Dana must like to eat marshmallows then.”

“I only eat marshmallows when we go camping.”

“We had Ghostbuster Marshmallows when we made s’mores! They were good! They were shaped like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and the green ghost.”

Dana Visits The Ghostbusters

The Ghostbusters are open for business with a new secretary played by Annie Potts, but there’s not a lot of clients walking in.

“Janine is working there now. She answers the phone.”

“She’s in the Ghostbusters cartoon.”

“I didn’t know there’s a cartoon!”

“Yeah. I got it from the library. It was good!”

“Dana saw the Ghostbusters on TV so she knows to go to them for help.”

“They put stuff on Dana’s head to make sure she’s not lying.”

“So is she lying?”

“No she’s telling the truth, but Louis is lying later cuz he’s a dog.”

Peter Investigates Dana’s Apartment

Peter arrives at Dana’s apartment, but doesn’t find anything strange going on and his main interest is towards Dana.

“Peter should look behind the refrigerator, the dog might be hiding behind it.”

“Peter likes Dana, but Dana thinks he’s weird and doesn’t like him.”

“She’ll like him later.”

The First Call

While eating dinner the Ghostbusters are surprised they’re needed somewhere. They race to a hotel that is being annoyed by a slimy green ghost.

“Do you see what the Ghostbusters have in their firehouse?”

“What?”

“Those big things against the wall are video games.”

“Do they have Halo?”

“Now they all get to slide down the pole!”

“Now their car looks cool! Their car is neat! I wish I had it. I would have the sirens and lights turned on all the time.”

“You know, some Ghostbusters fans make their own Ecto-1. They make their car look exactly like the one in the movie.”

“No way! That’s so cool!”

“This part is funny! They’re going to catch the green ghost. I love him! He’s always eating stuff!”

“His name is Slimer.”

“Ha! That’s ’cause he puts slime on stuff. I love him!”

“He’s in the cartoon too! He’s different in it though.”

“Peter just lied to that man. They’re not going to catch a cockroach. The man probably would be scared if Peter told him the truth.”

“I feel bad for that lady ’cause they almost killed her. They get better after they practice more.”

“Peter is all covered in slime. Yuck!”

“Which would you choose – being covered in slime or marshmallow?”

“Marshmallow, ’cause it’s just sticky and not icky.”

“Now Slimer is trapped in the little box and can’t get out!”

The Ghostbusters Being Busy Montage, Winston Joins The Team & Ray Gets a Ghostly Bedroom Visit

Business is booming for the Ghostbusters. They hire Ernie Hudson’s Winston to lend them a hand.

 “There are a lot of ghosts bothering people now so everyone is calling the Ghostbusters.”

“It’s good they have Janine to answer the phone.”

“Now that the Ghostbusters are good why don’t they go back to the library and catch the library ghost?”

“Maybe they did and we just didn’t see it.”

“Oh, they should of showed us that!”D

“What is the lady ghost doing to Ray?”

“Uhhhh…she’s tickling him.”

“He makes a funny face. He’s funny.”

“There are so many ghosts Winston becomes a Ghostbuster to help catch them!”

Walter Peck and Twinkies

We meet the villainous Walter Peck who works for the EPA and Harold Ramis’ Egon explains in a yummy metaphor how the ghost sightings in the city are increasing rapidly.

“This guy is the mean guy. He doesn’t like Peter ’cause Peter puts slime on him.”

“Egon is the smartest Ghostbuster.”

“Twinkles are so good! They’re only for desert and snacks though.”

Dana and Louis Get Attacked

Louis is throwing a kickass party in honor of his four years as an accountant. Between tax information about his guests and a mean buffet, the stone gargoyles come to life and attack Dana Louis.

“See I told you the dogs would come to life!”

“The dog is back in the kitchen and is going to go inside Dana now!”

“How does the dog know where Louis is to run after him?”

“Maybe he smells him.”

“But how did the dog get down the building to chase him?”

“He ran down the stairs I think.”

“Do you think the dogs look scary?”

“No. When it runs it looks fake.”

“I wouldn’t be scared, but if he chased me I would run away.”

Peter Meets The Gatekeeper

Arriving for his date with Dana, Peter learns that she has become possessed and is now the Gatekeeper searching for the Keymaster.

“Now that Dana is bad she can’t remember anything. Peter just knocked on the door and she opens it again! Why doesn’t she know it’s still him knocking???”

“There’s slime all over the walls. That means there’s ghosts around.”

“Why is she breathing funny?”

“Peter gave her medicine so it would make her sleep.”

“It doesn’t look like she’s having a nice nap.”

The Firehouse Explosion and The Mayors Office

Walter Peck storms into the Ghostbusters firehouse and shuts down the power grid releasing the captured ghosts all over the city. The Ghostbusters are arrested and summoned to the Mayor’s office.

“The explosion made Dana wake up!”

“The bad guy is lying. The Ghostbusters didn’t cause the explosion. He’s the bad guy who let all the ghosts out.”

“That’s the Empire State Building the ghosts are flying past. That’s where King Kong died. We saw it when we went to New York.”

“See Silmer just likes to eat! He ate all the man’s hotdogs Ha Ha! He’s so funny!”

“I don’t think Slimer can drink.”

“Why?”

“‘Cause it goes right through him.”

(I should have asked for the kid explanation as to why he can eat food then)

“Peter calls the bad guy a bad word here, but it’s ok ’cause he’s a bad guy.”

The Final Battle

As the Ghostbusters venture to Dana’s building they meet Zuul. Being all powerful and gearing up to end life on earth she forces them to choose what form it will happen in. Cue – the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man!

“The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is taller than the Empire State Building!”

“The Marshmallow Man came ’cause that’s what Ray was thinking about.”

“What would you have thought of if you had to choose the form of your destructor?”

“A Gummi Bear.”

“Why a Gummi Bear?”

“‘Cause their feet are stuck together and they can’t walk.”

“You could think of a bowtie ’cause that doesn’t have any feet!”

“I would bite Stay Puft’s foot.”

“Stay Puft looks like that guy on the commercials.”

“What guy?”

“He’s a round white guy.”

“Oh you mean The Michelin Man? The guy who sells tires?”

“I guess so. I don’t know his name.”

“Stay Puft kinda looks like the Pillsbury Dough Boy too right?”

“Who’s that?”

“I know him! He bakes stuff and laughs when you poke him!”

“Stay Puft is getting mad, but he can’t look scary.”

The Ghostbusters Cross The Streams

With no hope in sight the Ghostbusters are willing to sacrifice themselves to save the world. They cause a massive explosion that destroys Zuul and Mr. Stay Puft. Fortunately, the Ghostbusters survive, Dana and Louis are saved and the Ghostbusters are heroes!

“The bad guy gets marshmallow dumped on him. That’s good!”

“Now all the Ghostbusters have marshmallow on them.”

“Does the firehouse have a bathtub?”

“They probably have fire hoses.”

“There’s marshmallow everywhere! Kids would probably eat it all, but it would take a long time ’cause there’s so much of it.”

“Now Dana likes Peter ’cause he saved her. See they kiss!”

“Janine likes Egon in this one, but in the next one Louis becomes her boyfriend.”

“Why do you think that happened?”

“I don’t know. I can’t remember the second one.”

“Now all the Ghostbusters have to do is catch Slimer!”

“Is this a good movie?”

“YES!”

“Yeah, I like it too.”

“We know that. You have a Ghostbusters shirt.”

“Do you think the new Ghostbusters movie will be good?”

“No.”

“Are the boys going to be in it?”

“No it’s just the girls.”

“I like the boys.”

“I don’t think the girls will be funny.”

“In the new one ghosts can go into people though.”

“Well, the ghosts went into Dana and Louis in this one.”

“Yeah, but in the new one you can slap them out of the person.”

“They have a Lego toy of the new Ecto-1. I saw it in my Lego catalog.”

“Does the new Ecto-1 look better than the one you have?”

“No. I like this one better.”

“Is Stay Puft going to be in the new movie?”

“Kinda. He’s going to be a balloon.”

“Huh?”

“They think of a Stay Puft balloon???”

“No they think of the ghost logo and it comes to life.”

“What’s a logo?”

“The picture of the ghost. They think of that and it comes to life.”(Pointing to the picture of the ghost logo) Here’s a picture of the toy of what he looks like.”(pulling the picture up on my phone)

– Little eyes looking at the picture inquisitively

“And Slimer is going to be in it.”

– Silence

“So do you want to see the new Ghostbusters movie?”

“No.”

“I don’t care.”

“Well, if I got it and we had a movie night to watch it would you want to?”

“I guess so.”

“No.”

“I would watch it, but it’s not going to be as funny as the real one.”