Michael Bay's Transformers Returns! Third Times The Charm Maybe

Nope, this isn’t my review and reaction to Transformers 3: Dark Of The Moon. In fact I don’t plan on ever seeing it. I have no interest in it. I refuse to get ripped off by another Michael Bay spectacle ever again. Pearl Harbor was the last straw for me with the guy, but apparently movie audiences keep on turning up for his films.

Everyone will be and is going to see the latest Transformers film. The big July 4th weekend, a big budget special-effects film that’s targeted for kids, a popular toy line that comes to life. How can it not rake in tons of cash. And sadly the quality of the film has nothing to do with the guaranteed success it will have.

I will admit I did manage to see the first Transformers movie. It took me three nights to get through it and it was painful. Naturally, I skipped the second one. I couldn’t believe when people described it as worse than the first. I thought – “How is that possible??? Could that actually be done?”

Now it’s the third one coming around. Is it going to be any different than the last two. Probably not and why would anyone thing so? This franchise is unfairly extremely popular and has been since the beginning. Despite fans wanting – and rightfully – asking for better films they haven’t been given them. Michael Bay continues to dish out what he’s supposedly good at and audiences keep showing up. So why change now?

Even with Bay and Shia LeBeouf coming out and saying the second one sucked, but this third one will be better – how can anyone believe that? They already fooled fans twice and now they’re going for the hat trick.

Like I said I could care less about the Transformers franchise, Michael Bay, Shia LeBeouf, whether Megan Fox is in this one and if she’s replaced by Victoria Secrets underwear model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. It doesn’t matter what the ingredients are, if Michael Bay is in the kitchen the results will always be the same.

The one thing I do enjoy, more than the latest installment of this mind-numbing franchise is the reaction from fans who deservedly want to voice their dissatisfaction with the filmmakers for serving up another epically long, humorless, heartless special effects reel.

These rants have more passion and enthusiasm for these films than Michael Bay ever had for wanting to tell these stories.

Plus, they’re hysterical!