John Heard Archives - HaphazardStuff

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The Package (1989) – A Review

01/20/2022 HapStuff 2

A review of the 1989 Cold War thriller The Package, starring Gene Hackman, Tommy Lee Jones, Joanna Cassidy, John Heard, Dennis Franz and Pam Grier, directed by Andrew Davis

Sharknado (2013) – A Review

07/27/2013 HapStuff 2

A review of the 2013 SyFy schlocky b-movie pop culture phenomenon Sharknado starring Ian Ziering, Tara Reid, Cassier Scerbo and John Heard

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Heaven Help Us (1985) – A Review

06/06/2013 HapStuff 0

Comedic and tough life unfolds in a Brooklyn Catholic school in 1965. A review of the 1985 teen/sex/comedy Heaven Help Us, starring Andrew McCarthy, Mary Stuart Masterson, Kevin Dillion, Patrick Dempsey, Dana Barron, Stephen Geoffreys, John Heard and Donald Sutherland.

Better Off Dead (1985) – A Review

A review of the 1985 teen comedy cult classic Better Off Dead, starring John Cusack, Diane Franklin, Curtis Armstrong, Amanda Wyss, written & directed by Savage Steve Holland
My Bodyguard (1980) – A Review

A review of the 1980 high school drama My Bodyguard, starring Chris Makepeace, Adam Baldwin and Matt Dillion, about a picked on student who hires the school’s big feared kid to protect him from bullies
Hamburger: The Motion Picture (1986) – A Review

A review of the 1986 comedy Hamburger: The Motion Picture, a group of misfits enroll in a fast food college in the hopes of becoming franchise owners. Part sex comedy, part satire on McDonalds
Just One of The Guys (1985) – A Review

A review of the 1985 cult teen comedy Just One Of The Guys, starring Joyce Hyser, Clayton Rohner, William Zabka, Billy Jayne and Sherilyn Fenn, a teen girl masquerades as a guy to get a story for an article
Real Genius (1985) – A Review

A review of the 1985 teen comedy Real Genius, starring Val Kilmer, Gabriel Jarret, William Atherton, Michelle Meyrink, Robert Prescott and Patti D’Arbanville, about the goofy, funny life of young geniuses
Three O’Clock High (1987) – A Review

A review of the 1987 cult classic high school comedy Three O’Clock High, starring Casey Siemaszko, Richard Tyson, Jeffrey Tambor, John P. Ryan and Philip Baker Hall
The Wild Life (1984) – A Review

A review of the 1984 teen sex comedy The Wild Life, starring Christopher Penn, Eric Stoltz, Lea Thompson, Ilan Mitchell Smith, Rick Moranis and Randy Quaid. Written by Cameron Crowe as almost a follow-up to his classic Fast Times At Ridgemont High.
Stewardess School (1986) – A Review

A review of the 1986 comedy Stewardess School, about a misfit group who have dreams of serving in the friendly skies
Cavegirl (1985) – A Review

A modern day geek from 1985 miraculously travels back in time to the stone age and meets a beautiful cavegirl, in the 1985 teen comedy Cavegirl starring Daniel Roebuck and Cynthia Thompson.
My Tutor (1983) – A Review

A high school virgin gets his own personal French tutor – who happens to be gorgeous! Do you think he’ll learn more than just French from her? It’s the 1983 teen/sex/comedy My Tutor starring Caren Kaye, Matt Lattanzi, Kevin McCarthy, Kitten Natividad and Crispin Glover.
Midnight Madness (1980) – A Review

Four diverse teams of college students compete in an all night game to solve clues that will take them all around the city. It’s the 1980 teen comedy Midnight Madness starring David Naughton, Stephen Furst, Eddie Deezen, Maggie Roswell & Michael J. Fox
Private Resort (1985) – A Review

Two horny teens go on vacation at a Miami resort and get into misadventures with girls and a jewel thief. It’s Private Resort the 1985 comedy starring Johnny Depp, Rob Morrow, Hector Elizondo and Leslie Easterbrook
Hot T-Shirts (1980) – A Review

In order to save his failing bar the owner gets a brilliant idea – to have wet t-shirt contests! It brings the crowds in and makes money, but it also brings some problem. It’s the 1980 low-budget teen/sex/comedy Hot T-Shirts.
Tomboy (1985) – A Review

A tomboy has her eyes more than just working on cars as she falls for a race car driver. She sets out to prove tomboys can be sexy too! It’s the 1985 teen/sex/comedy Tomboy starring Betsy Russell
Losin’ It (1983) – A Review

A group of high school friends set out on a wild weekend in Tijuana to score with some girls and get their hands on Spanish Fly. It’s the 1983 teen/sex/comedy Losin’ It starring Tom Cruise, Shelley Long and Jackie Earle Haley
Secret Admirer (1985) – A Review

A love letter creates confusion, suspicion and comedic misadventures in the 1985 teen/sex/comedy Secret Admirer starring C. Thomas Howell, Lori Loughlin and Kelly Preston
Hardbodies (1984) – A Review

Three middle-aged men get schooled on how to pick up beach babes – and they get awfully good at it! It’s the 1984 teen/sex/comedy Hardbodies
Spring Break (1983) – A Review

Four college friends go on comedic misadventures with girls and drinking as they spend time in Ft. Lauderdale on their Spring Break, the 1983 teen/sex/comedy starring David Knell, Perry Lang, Paul Land and Corinne Wahl, directed by Sean S. Cunningham
Fraternity Vacation (1985) – A Review

Two pairs of dueling frat brothers bet which can score with a sexy blonde while on vacation in Palm Springs. It’s the 1985 teen/sex/comedy Fraternity Vacation, starring Tim Robbins, Cameron Dye, Stephen Geoffreys, Amanda Bearse and Sheree J. Wilson
They’re Playing With Fire (1984) – A Review

A sexy college professor seduces her student and they become embroiled in a murder plot. It’s the 1984 erotic thriller They’re Playing With Fire starring Sybil Danning and Eric Brown.