If You’re Going To Lie Try To Be Good At It

Some people just can not tell a lie.

Oh, wait a second I should make that statement a bit clearer about the liars I am talking about here. Yes, some people lie. The BS words come spewing out of their mouths, they try to look you in the eye and attempt to make the web of deceit all sound sincere so you’ll easily swallow it. It’s just that THEY CAN NOT DO IT EFFECTIVELY.

Yes, that’s what I’m trying to say.

I sometimes forget how incredibly untalented some people are at the art of deception. You have these backstabbing people who smile at your face while they’re sharpening a knife and gearing up to plunge into your back. And they seriously think they’re pulling one over on you! But even before they opened their mouth you’re already onto them and their shifty behavior.

It’s amazing.

It almost becomes a game for you. Instead of you sitting there nodding your head and listening intently on what bull they’re trying to feed you, you just become mesmerized by their terrible performance of trying to be a successful two-face.

I guess it could be they think they’re genuinely really good at lying and are able to pull it off no problem with anyone. While they’re babbling they think they’re successfully pulling this fib off and that you’re believing every word they say. Or maybe they just think everyone else is a complete idiot, that they’re much smarter than everyone else and that others will easily swallow whatever tall tale they try to eloquently spin.

It’s almost even more insulting than the lie itself – that blasé confident attitude they have where they’re acting completely innocent lying to your face. If you’re going to lie to me than at least make an effort to try to sell it! Do a performance, try to make it solid.

The best is when with little effort you can bring up a simple contradiction to the lie they’re trying to spin and they have absolutely no response to that legitimate question. They never thought to cover such a huge gap in their lie. They’re stunned that you were able to think up something so obvious and you have trapped them with a befuddled look of widened eyes. Theres’s nothing else for them to do, but to gather up their lying ammo and slink away.

If you’re going to try to lie to someone, at least try to be good at it. Prep yourself and the fable you’re going to create. Try to make it up hold up at least under light scrutiny. Don’t think everyone is as gullible as you are.